To drizzle as quiet rain drops,
Not to be their stubborn touch;
To be lost in the vast of blue
Not to touch the brim, waste as such.
To be the orange warmth on a blue skin,
Not to scorch the essence of one's being;
To be the light burning in your eyes
Not the reason for the shadow in its skies.
Oh! To be like the soothing wind and how it flows
Not be the one which wreaks havoc and heaves fatal blows;
To be the whiff of a fresh air blast
Not be the corner of one's breath last.
To be a well crafted dream,
Not the nightmare with the darkest stream;
To be the question in a curious mind
Definitely not the doubt in its crevices entwined..
Subtle. Very subtle. Yet so much hidden in the layers. It was not apparent in the first read, but reading subsequently, I found that there was a wonderful integration of the four classical elements in the four stanzas of your wonderful questioning yet suggesting yet subtle yet honest work.
ReplyDeleteWater
Fire
Air
Earth
Water. Infinity. To be the vast infinite and not touch the shoreline (in a way). Like the spray of water on the face through a gentle drizzle and not be pelted upon and feel lost and drowned.
Fire. It is actually interesting to note the usage of words here. "Orange warmth on blue skin". And not to "scorch". This gave me the original idea of the hidden symbols of elements at play in your work. A very delicate and interesting play here "To be the light burning in your eyes/Not the reason for the shadow in its skies".
Air. Again the similar theme of being subtle. The way fresh breeze would gently fan one, instead of the heavy winds that may distract and heave "fatal blows" as you say. "Whiff of a fresh air blast", catchy.
Earth. The presence of the fourth element may not be evident in one straight glance, yet it is there. Dreams. Nightmares. Mind. These frames hint at being grounded or rooted. Refer to the earth-like qualities from whence stem these.
In whole, your work questions the very existence that defines a being. It speaks of personalities and their manifestations. It speaks of belongingness, of how a person may belong to the world and to another person. It is interesting to see the usage of "definitely" in the last line, something you want to emphasize and say for sure. There is a lot of subtle elements in your work. It would make one wonder and think about how they are and how they belong, to themselves and to someone else. To be subtle and make a mark like the gentle spray of water from the waves that crash on the shore, carried by the wind...or else to be the ever consuming fire that scorches and swallows, leaving shadow and darkness behind.
Good one! Great going!